|Mom, Heather (with a far-off look in her eyes), sister Cheryl|
When I taught junior high school, if the class was too quiet, I knew that something was afoot, someone was up to no good. Of course I understood life in terms of rules, right and wrong behavior, choices, etc. But since coming to this teaching the lines are blurred. Because I know that God or Good is everywhere present, the best thing someone could say to me is that I am "Up to Know Good." I am living on purpose and living following the stirrings of my soul.
Just like the junior high students would get quiet, you and I need to get quiet, to still our busy minds and our bodies, this is required to Know Good. When I began meditating, I had the erroneous thought that there was a "right" way to do it. I would try so hard not to think about anything. I would be so intent on doing it right my body was filled with tension. Of course, nothing can happen in that atmosphere. All I was able to do was to know God as struggle. But since God could not possibly struggle, I was using the holiness of the I AM unwisely. When I remembered the quiet expectancy of the evening of my spiritual awakening, I realized that I had begun my spiritual journey by getting still to "know Good."
Some of you know my spiritual awakening story, and if you know it, skip to the end of this blog. When I was a young woman, in my early thirties, I was quite cynical. I believed that "religion was the opiate of the people" and was not for me. I was too smart. (Haha!) I had just started teaching again after a two year interruption to prove myself in the real world. I was living in a huge old house, built in the early 1900's. I was newly married for the second time. My sister and her boyfriend were living with us.
One Saturday evening, in early September,in addition to the four of us, my girlfriend from Calgary and a new neighbor, recently moved from London,had a dinner party. We barbequed steaks,with all the fixings -- baked potatoes,corn on the cob and ceasar salad. The wine flowed freely. None of us had to drive anywhere that night. After dinner while we were sitting around sharing stories, our new neighbor Hayley, asked if we were interested in the supernatural. We all had some curiosity. None of us had any religious convictions that this was bad or wrong. She had a Ouija Board which she brought over. We started playing.
We relaxed and put our hands lightly on the board. Then as if powered by something unseen,the cursor flew around that board. We all looked at each other suspiciously. Who was making this happen? It was delivering a message to me, the great skeptic. It answered some questions. The big question I had was, "Did I know the man who recently shocked me with an obscene phone call? Did I know this person? What reason would he have for doing such a thing?"
The Board told me that the call was from my first boyfriend, one that I had throughout highschool and first year college. When asked why would he do it? the Ouija Board answered with a group of letters, that we determined was a French word. It was still a mystery but was going to get cleared up in a few days. My sister was studying at a French immersion college and she didn't know the word and asked her professor who also didn't know but later found the word in a French dictionary. It is obsolete and hasn't been used in common usage since the 1100's! What does it mean? It means to reclaim what was once yours, as in claiming an indentured servant. I didn't find that out until later that week, but after the revelation of why we decided to ask, to whom are we communicating. The answer was God! Now, nothing could have shocked this smart-aleck, know-it-all agnostic more than the word, "God."