Friday, July 15, 2016

Wholeness Revealed as Scars are Healed

Sister Kathy and I

In preparation for Altogether Day this coming Sunday, I have been watching the movie "Frozen." The movie explores many themes including the true love between sisters and how actions can be misinterpreted. I began thinking that our deep emotional scars may not have been incurred through a parent's angry words, or a teacher's frustrated statements, but through a siblings's inexplicable actions. When I was a little girl, and even today, my older sister was my role model. I wanted to be just like her. I especially wanted her approval for my activities.

When I was in kindergarten, our class was doing a version of the "The Hokey Pokey" for our annual Christmas concert. The auditorium was crowded with adults and children. Evidently my sister had been teasing me that I would forget the lyrics or more likely put the wrong foot in. When the rest of the children filed off, I when to the front of the stage and peered down at her and asked, "Wasn't I good Kathryn?" She was in 5th grade and was angry that all eyes were on her. She didn't speak to me on the drive home. Of course, I was heartbroken.

That incident held the seed to the biggest belief that I had to overcome on the way to being a platform minister. What I had to get to was the awareness that if I was pleased with what I said or did, then it didn't matter at all whether others approved or not.

Recently when I spent time with sister, she told me how much she regretted being embarrassed and angry. All these years later, those were words I wanted to hear. Wholeness was revealed and scars of the past were healed.

In "Frozen" Elsa, the older sister has magical powers that become uncontrolled when she is upset. Her parents teach her to "conceal, not feel." They did it for her good and the safety of her sister, but it is among the worst pieces of advice I have ever heard. From it, her sister thought that she was no longer loved; that they were no longer friends.

The movie has a beautiful ending in which the true love that sisters have for one another is the healing power of life itself. 

In a way, all of us have the power to heal or to hurt. Our "magic" is in the words we use and the actions we take.