What is within you is
greater than your history. Your history does not need to decide your
destiny unless you decide it must. –
Mary Morrissey
I saw a recent
Facebook post titled If You Experienced Emotional Abuse As A
Child, You Probably Do These Things As An Adult”. The
article was posted from a medical site by a retired CSL minister and it had a
lot of useful information on how those experiences shaped current behaviors.
Most of the comments posted about the article were positive and came from
students of New Thought including practioners and ministers.
Someone noted that “Many use this information as a reason to be a victim all their life and
blame their family the rest of their lives. It is frustrating to see them tell
themselves that is their story for the rest of their life.”
As I read that
comment I was reminded of a common myth promoted by many people who call
themselves coaches. Many are taught to say that the difference between a coach
and a therapist is that a therapist looks at the past while a coach is only
interested in the future. This of course is not true. As both a therapist and a practitioner, in either role I am interested in assisting
people to live full, prosperous and
satisfying lives in the present and the future.
Each person is not a problem to be fixed or a hole to be filled. Each of us is a light to be shined, not
covered over. However, there is a clear purpose for and benefit to exploring a
person’s personal history before treating.
Naturally I
approach my work differently as a
practitioner/minister than as a therapist, because I am being asked to supply a
different service in each case. As a therapist I am asked to use my knowledge,
training and skills to deal with and help heal conditions from a physical human
perspective. As practitioner I am asked to employ all of my knowledge, training
and skills to help heal a condition from a different perspective.
As a practitioner and minister I am seeing beyond conditions into the Source
of all conditions and know the client’s true perfection at the level of Source.
Be that as it may, as a therapist
trained as a Science of Mind Minister and practitioner I bring all of my
abilities to every situation.
However just as when
wearing my “therapist” hat, when I am acting as a practitioner I find it is
useful to look into the person’s history.
I don’t do it to help the person wallow in their past or to assign
blame. I do it to understand where the
error in belief occurred, how it happened and what sustains it. By
understanding those things, I can target my treatments to the real blockage. To
solve a problem it is important to identify the right problem.
Spirit, Source,
Higher Power whatever you want to call It is constantly creating and each
of us is a Divine idea in Mind. Spirit creates us as vehicles for doing what
Life does, create channels to express more of its essence. Spirit extends
itself through and as us into this realm of time and space, which it also
created, for the richness of learning that is possible in physical form. Our
primary drive is to express experiences of more Love, more success of all kinds
(health, relationships, financial, joy, satisfaction, peace, beauty, appreciation,
gratitude,) and every possible good. As stated earlier, each of is a light to
be shined.
The catch is that
in this human experience our operating system for Mind is largely in our human
brain which is also designed to preserve our survival. To aid in this, our
brains are always searching for patterns, specially patterns that warn us that
danger is possibly near. Pattern recognition helped our early ancestors avoid
danger by noticing everything that resembled a previous threat.
When we try to change patterns that are not working for us, our
brain automatically activates ideas, beliefs and behaviors that were developed
to defend against something that was once a threat. It may no longer be happening
but the pull of the familiar is strong because it feels safe. Something familiar that worked is hard to
release.
Exploring personal
history is valuable because it helps
us identify and understand how the erroneous and often unconscious
beliefs that are driving those unhelpful
behaviors were created. It can remove the mystery by bringing previously
unexamined beliefs into conscious awareness.
As individualized self-conscious
expressions of the Divine you and I are blessed with the capacity to generate
new original thoughts which allow us to change our minds. The first step to getting out of a cage is to
recognize that you are in one.
Discovering that you
built the cage because it was the best defense you could come up with at
the time against something that was but is no longer happening helps sidestep
useless self-blame and also accept the possibility that the cage is not needed
anymore. Finding out that you created the cage for understandable reasons (not
just 'cause you are defective) is good news. Even better news is that you built
it so you have the power to learn how to open the door and step out.
Posted by Rev. Bruce Fredenburg
Staff Minister; Science of Mind in Mental Health
In addition to being an Ordained Minister with Centers for Spiritual Living Reverend Bruce is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, practicing in Laguna Hills, California since 1982. He is a Clinical Member of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, a Child Specialist and Divorce Coach with Collaborative Divorce Solutions Orange County a member of the International Association of Collaborative Professionals and is a trained Mediator. Reverend Bruce is also a professional speaker who brings wit and humor into everything he does He has served as a Staff Minister with a focus on Science of Mind in Mental Health at CSLCV since 2003
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