Why I chose not to post about Autism Awareness in April.

Expect Amazing things from a child with a Autism diagnosis.

In April 2013 I blogged The Awareness of Autism. It was a personal account of my relationship with the diagnosis of a child with this label.  This year I chose not to participate in the "blueness" of Awareness.  The reason is definitely Spiritual lead.  Over this year I have gained perspective that I once did not have.  I had revelations that were difficult to admit.  I was given the opportunity to see what a diagnosis really is, and what it really is not.  Basically, a diagnosis is a label of limitation; it is a way to categorize something as being like something else.  It is to tell a human, this is what you have, this is what you should expect, this is what you can and cannot do.  This is who you are.  This is the label you have been given to place you in this box.

When families are given a diagnosis for their child of Autism, it is not a welcome label.  It, however, needs to be given to receive services a child needs to help receive therapy.  When a child sees improvement in their condition, a diagnosis could change or services could be discontinued.  This is something that could frighten parents.  Parents can become anxious if the child no longer has services they think they need.

What I have noticed is the diagnosis doesn't limit my son.  He doesn't even know he has autism.  What I noticed is that it limits me, in my ability to be confident in his abilities outside of the diagnosis.  It is hard to admit as a parent to see your child as having restrictions to living.  Yes, I am not completely oblivious to the fact that he has challenges.  What I have to do in my own mind is to know that he is capable of more, a lot more, than his diagnosis.  A diagnosis doesn't define him. It allows him to have assistance where needed, however, he is much more capable than I ever thought, and he's proving it to me every day.  Though I always have known his Spiritual Connection existed, I am regretful that it took this long to be confident in his human spirit.  He has a strong human spirit.  His ability to see good and fun in life is very infectious.  He has taught our whole family what resilience looks like.  My story is not dissimilar to other families I know with children having a diagnosis.  Given the opportunity, our children will rise up to a space that will break out of the box of a label.  Instead of spreading an Awareness of Autism, I am choosing to spread an Awareness of the Human Spirit.

Enjoy this video from Michael Gott at the Mile Hi Church. He visited CSLCV last week, he was AMAZING.

Final Draft is not final: Revising your story.

Your life: What a story to tell. 

In the Joyous Living Journal, March 8 is titled, The Script of your Life.  Rewriting your life story can be quite an undertaking, especially if not ready for it.  Imagine everything that you are, everything that you thought you knew, all being completely topsy-turvy.  How would you be in the world if everything was turned upside down?  When you are living with remnants of thoughts that do not serve you, seeking out a change to living may start to look alluring.  It can take on a life of its own, when you decide that it's time for a change. Once you make that decision, your world starts to come into a different view.  When you begin to come from a different reference point, your peripheral vision begins to expand and you start to look at life as you have never seen before.

A shift in perception occurred in my own life recently.  I attended a one-day event as a guest from a friend's invitation.  I wasn't really sure what to expect, I went with an open heart and willingness to experience whatever happens.  It was a group of about 16 people.  As the introductions of each participant occurred, I felt at ease.  Then, as the facilitator, from the Academy of Intuition, Ghazaleh Lowe, began to question the participants, I felt the stirring occur.

As the day went on I was in a lot of physical pain.  My headache was huge and all my cells felt on fire.  It was an uncomfortable experience to say the least, however I knew that something was really happening, something was really changing.  All these years living with an unresolved emotion were pouring out of my body, and pain was the by-product of suppression.  The emotion revolving around the judgment I have on myself as a special needs parent, and regarding the label of Autism was the subject of my stirrings. The past suppression felt necessary so they wouldn't get in the way of my advocacy.  However, this was the time I choose to release them.  At the end of the day I was physically exhausted, and I needed rest.

Over the course of the days following, I was in an interesting place, moving through life in a more profound contemplation and introspection.  Did I really change?  This is the question I am left with when in contemplation.  What I have found is that the question has to stop being asked, and at some point the answer has to take over, embodied and acted upon.  The really interesting part of it all is that the real answer is two-sided.  Did I really change?  "Yes" and "No."  "Yes," in regards to thoughts, "No," in regards to the true nature of who I am as a Spiritual Being.  All the thoughts in my head can be a distraction from knowing Self, yet Self is always Known.  The action is to remain connected throughout the entire day, not just during meditation or in prayer, in every moment of life, training myself to continually come back to center.  I do not have to remind myself to breathe, my body automatically functions without me having to think about it.  This is the call to action of this training, constantly come back to the Awareness of Now.  Be in a state of constant connection, so the thoughts floating in my mind can be tamed, or become non-existent.

And the end of the group, Ghazaleh asked me, "Are you ready for this?" My answer, "Yes." her response, "Are you sure?" my response, "No."  Being open to the Yes, I am ready to revise my story because this is not my Final Draft.

What if EVERYTHING already was Perfect?

If you look closely, you'll know Perfection.

Carefully crafted bows, mud wars, an argument, and a sunset are all Perfect. 

When we hear the word perfect, do we think of things unfolding in a manner exactly according to our plan? Do we have an expectation of others to do exactly what we want them to do, in exactly the time they should do them, and in the order we think they should do them in? Do we set unreasonably high standards for ourselves and for those around us? When those standards are not met, do we become unglued, have a melt-down or become unruly?

In a high-end retail environment, we expect perfection. An item chosen for gifting, placed inside a blue box, surrounded by a carefully crafted bow "should" be perfect. What if something goes "wrong" in this scenario? Well, guess what? Though it may not have turned out perfect, it still was Perfect.  Here is where the understanding of perfect vs. Perfection comes in. 

Most every evening in Southern California we are witness to a spectacular display of awe, by way of the sunset. The golden, pink, sometimes purple hues painted across a strategically placed, clouded, sky is a sight of Perfection. Knowing that this moment will never be the same again, is a time to stop and reflect on its Perfection without judgment. Yes, it is easy to see Perfection in this sunset, what about the rest of life? 

"When Jesus said, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect," he was telling us there is a Perfection at the center of all things, which, recognized, will spring into being. We must learn to identify ourselves with this Perfection to so accept it that it is real to us and to so live that it may be expressed through us. Every organ, action and function of our physical body is rooted in Spiritual Perfection, from which it draws life." -Ernest Holmes-

Seeing a child play in mud can cause cringe-worthy responses from moms. For in that moment, the mom may be predicting the future repercussions of this muddy moment. For the mom, this may be a far from perfect way to engage in social play. It, however, is Perfection in action when recognizing the benefits this type of play is providing to a child. Mud can actually lift one's mood because it increases the levels of serotonin in our brains. When moms recognize the Perfection, they may even want to join. 

http://www.letthechildrenplay.net/2011/08/10-reasons-why-we-should-let-children.html

Can there be a Perfect argument? When a child is diagnosed with autism, they sometimes are non-verbal, have limited speech or speech-delayed. Hoping, wishing, and praying for a breakthrough in verbal skills are heard around the world from parents of non-verbal children. How fortunate it is to hear a child argue with their sibling over anything. Though the high volume can be less that "perfect," the Spiritual Perfection of this communication can bring joy to a parent's ears. 

One does not have to look very far for Perfection, just look everywhere.  Even if it is not "perfect," according to our human standards, we must remember to look beyond our expectations to see the Spiritual Perfection of life. Just because something didn't come out "perfect" doesn't mean it isn't Perfection. It just means our limited beliefs are keeping us from seeing what true Perfection really is. Next time a less than perfect circumstance occurs, look deeper for the Perfection. 

The Awareness of Autism

As we come to the conclusion to the month of April, autism will remain near and dear to my heart.  In case you didn't know, April is autism awareness month and those who live their lives surrounded by this diagnosis are trying hard to make you aware.  I've done my share of the work, especially on April 2nd.  This was the day where the world was "lighting it up blue". Posting pictures from various landmarks, colleges, groups all taking on the blue spirit, had me pulled to bombard my friends in social media.  However, the day prior, on April 1st, I shared a great visual from Talk About Curing Autism (TACA).

This image really had me deeply thinking.  I remember way back in my Spiritual unfoldment, hearing the statement, "The first step is awareness".  I remembered several years later in a conversation with a friend stating that I am very aware of my life, now how do I get out of awareness?  What I didn't know is that there is an awareness of life as opposed to Awareness.  Now, knowing the difference, I reflect on how autism has affected my life.


When parent(s) are dealt the news of autism, the stages of grief are introduced.  Once the stages wear away (which, by the way, is probably never) then action/go mode is in effect.  Decisions are made for a young child that would probably not be thought of unless needing desensitization to living life. Screams, that make one want to come to the rescue, are heard behind a closed bedroom door, as therapists work with inabilities to be flexible.  Deciding to have a 3 year old child ride the bus 30-40 minutes to school, so that the future will be easier to handle, is a painful choice.  Second guessing is a conversation that is had many times over.  Trying to overcome self-scrutiny, while societal scrutiny is peering over your shoulder is losing battle.  Avoiding stares of judgment while a child is tantruming becomes the norm.  Autism can become all-encompassing, with the utmost goal of fixing what is wrong with a child.  Here lies the struggle, the constant confrontation within.  How does one continue to love a child just the way he is?  Can one see who the child really Is when always trying to fix them?

Yes, this is part of my story and so is the following:

Seeing a child as a unique, emanation of God is a blessing.  Seeing this in a child diagnosed with autism takes on an awe-inspiring tone.  In the midst of this diagnosis, something bewildering is set upon the universe.  A Knowingness that all in right with the world.  For in these Beings are ways of communicating so far beyond comprehension, that just marveling at their abilities, is a shift in consciousness.  Some of these beings were given a grim diagnosis; however, we are becoming so much more aware of their capabilities and way of expressing themselves, that a Spiritual revelation is taking place.  And if you just stop to be witness of it, you will discover amazing things about yourself.  Being in awe of a child diagnosed with autism isn't that difficult.  Know, they too, are a Spiritual Being having their own experience in this time and space as this human expression.

Each day I experience a child diagnosed with autism is an interesting one.  When I focus on my 10-year old son's abilities, I am amazed how his brain works.  Yes, assistance is needed to help him along his journey, however, being that vehicle of assistance takes on a different understanding.  It's an honor to be a parent of any child, to be a parent of a child diagnosed with autism allowed me the gift to deepen my Spiritual strength.  Believing is seeing, has brought a sense of freedom in my life and the understanding of my place in his.  As co-creators in Spirit, as my son and I walk hand-in-hand, I know this experience will continue to lead me into greater unfoldment in the I AM.

Cultivating a relationship





May we always be connected
in our traveling journeys.
And may you
always know
how deeply you are loved
how your life shines brightly.
And how your heart is never alone.
-The Kelly Rae Roberts Collection-


With our month theme, Connection: The lives you touch, coming to an end, I reflect on the relationship I have with my daughter.  Having a 12 year old daughter who has a great time being around her parents is such a blessing.  Having a daughter, who is also a sibling of special needs child, is also challenging.  For in that relationship, a look at her needs to "feel" special must be addressed.

Sometimes it can seem as if Autism encompasses everything, and she can take on a responsibility to always correct her 10-year-old brother's behavior.  Relieving her of that duty is a constant conversation.  However, I know there will always be some sort of responsibility she will endure.

At the beginning of the year, my "conscious" effort was to cultivate a relationship in Consciousness with my daughter.  With our bedtime prayer & meditation we grow closer in Spirit.  Whenever I find a quote or image of connection or humor, I place them in a file created on our computer. She selects some to print and places in her school locker or in her binder.  She finds a sense of peace throughout the day with these prints.  For Valentine's Day, the art piece from The Kelly Rae Roberts Collection was found in a mall gift store.  The words alone sparked a deeper conversation between us.  To delve deeper into our own thoughts, this wonderful mother-daughter journal.  Just between us: A no-stress, no-rules journal for girls and their moms by Meredith & Sophie Jacobs.  The whole section of starting the process is a great process, it's all about collaboration.  And, as suggested, I created a "special" fancy pen to write in it.  With all this cultivation we're getting ready for next month's theme, SHINE!!

Cultivating relationships through journaling.



Your Vote Can Be Like Santa For A Kid With Autism

Can I get a click from you? Surfer's Healing is taking part in this years American Giving Awards, $2 million dollars is going to be shared with the charities that get the most votes.

Surfers Healing seeks to enrich the lives of children with autism and the lives of their families by exposing them to the unique experience of surfing. All of this is provided at no charge to them.

Surfers Healing was founded by our friends Israel & Danielle Paskowitz. Their son, Isaiah, was diagnosed with autism at age three. Isaiah often suffered from sensory overload. The ocean was the one place where he seemed to find respite. A former competitive surfer, Israel hit upon an idea. With Isaiah on the front of his surfboard, and Izzy steering from the back, the two spent the day surfing together. Surfing had a profound impact on Isaiah.

They decided to share this unique therapy with other autistic children and expose them to a completely new experience of surfing.

Voting Ends Today! Be Like Santa!