What Does Self Worth Look Like?

Steeped in my new awareness of Self Worth and I found some buried treasure this week.

After this month of "Self Worth" being the theme of talks and blog posts and meditation how do I peel all this off the page and actually put it into my life.

Where are the moments I need to take a breath and make a new choice?

So I brainstormed throughout the week, when opportunities arose I thought about the ramifications of my choices. So this is my list, feel free to add yours in the comments below.

Self Worth Is

Self worth means making sure I'm eating right with good food choices eatten in the right atmosphere and attitude. 

Self Worth Is Not

Feeding the kids but skipping my meals and relying on coffee and erratic snacking to take care of my nutritional needs. Yes it matters, even for Mom.

Self Worth Is

Taking active means to adjust my thoughts, the seeds of my self talk, with affirmations and techniques. Taking time to be grateful can shift energy quickly and profoundly. There is so much to be grateful for. 

Self Worth Is Not

Snarky and self depreicating humor is not the benign, insignificant thing I thought it once was. Would I want my daughters to adopt these comments as their self talk? See the humor in our daily mistakes, losing the car keys, leaving the coffee on the car roof and driving away, walking away from a toddler with a Sharpie marker within reach, yes these moments are ripe for humor but it doesn't have to be self-depricating humor.

Self Worth Is

The practice of meditation, daily free writing, taking time outdoors (perferably barefoot) feeds me. Taking time to connect empowers me to be my best for myself and others. There is time.

Self Worth Is Not

There is no prize for being the most harried, the most run down, the one with the most impossible schedule or expectations. No prizes here ... move on.

Self Worth Is

Self worth is taking time to unearth those false beliefs we have about ourselves and getting rid of them. Self worth knows the truth of our infinite potential.

Self Worth Is Not

Self worth does not harbor limiting beliefs about itself. Self worth doesn't say "I can't." It may say "I choose not to at this time." Self worth knows that we are worthy of our greatest desires. 

Self Worth Is

Self worth knows it's connection to all things and knows that we are perfect and loved in our current state. 

Self Worth Is Not

Self worth does not feel disconnection, It is the illustion of separatedness which makes us feel pain. Invest your attention in the connection of all things, the wonders of the world and know that you are one and the same.

Self Worth Is

Self worth is teachable. Taking time to be teachable and not fall for the illusions of the ego. To soften and let the world teach you something new with a open and receptive heart.

Self Worth Is Not

Self worth is not rigid or fragile. Self worth does not feel personally rejected if others do not want to do things exactly how you want to do them. Self worth doesn't have to be a know it all. Self worth can learn from others without feeling threatened.

How do you experience Self Worth?

Epilepsy Was My Lesson in Self Care

18 Years Old & Diagnosised with Epilespy

When I was 18 I was diagnosed with Epilepsy and put on a prescription of Dilantin.

It was my freshman year in college and I was terrified I would make a mistake. I took the hardest classes I could get my hands on. Advanced Placement Chemistry and Russian Language would have been enough for anyone but I had to add on Economics, Religion 101 and a filmmaking class for fun.

I had begun to get headaches and pass out on occasion. It would come with no warning. I would get dizzy and the next thing I knew I was in a heap on the floor. My diagnosis meant I couldn't have a driver's license, I had to take this mind-numbing medication and I certainly didn't linger in stairwells.

I was taken to a few Neurologists. They gave me the regular battery of tests. But even the EEG that I had to stay up all night for revealed nothing.

Now I must add that the head of the Neurology department did make the suggestion to practice martial arts. At the time that seemed like a very off the wall suggestion, in retrospect it was probably the best advice I received at the time.

What the tests couldn't detect is what was going on in my head. The fear, the self criticism, the "if it's not perfect it's RUINED" attitude.

I had myself wound up beyond recognition.

Yesterday I proudly watched our teens share their experience at camp. I was just so impressed with their poise and application of Principle in their lives. Their self knowledge, their compassion for others and themselves, their wisdom and their ability to articulate what is going on with themselves.

What a gift to have these tools and teachings and support at this age. Meditation alone would have been transformational!

I think that is why I am so glad my girls are here. They know that life unfolds as it should. They know to listen to their inner wisdom and that they are creative beings in a creative universe.
 

Self Care Mary Oliver

One night this week, I was awake most of the night with what felt like glass shards in my lower abdomen. After my 8 AM conference call, I decided to go back to bed and get some more sleep. I slept until 2:30 PM, then took the rest of the day off. The next morning I was talking to a wise woman who praised me for this action. She asked me, "Do you make self-care your highest priority?" She admonished me that as a care-giver, it was really important to look after myself.

When you travel by plane, the flight attendant always reminds the passengers, "Put on your own oxygen mask first, then look after the others in your care. Indeed it makes sense for a mother travelling with small children AND it makes sense for every one of us. If we don't learn to take care of our own needs, what will we have to give? I have been a minister for a long time. I know the Principles of life really well but sometimes I don't practice as well as I could.

Maybe we all need a reminder, a cheat sheet for self care. The spiritual essentials are; prayer, meditation, tithing, serving, and learning. So do you make your spiritual time a priority? Do you love yourself enough to give yourself the first hour in every day to connect with Source? Do you take time to do things that make your heart sing? Do you know when you are depleting yourself and when you are refueling?

I know that there are ways to refuel for me. Reading a poem by Hafiz, Rumi, David Whyte or Mary Oliver will often do it for me. Listening to really beautiful music or being in the mountains will also inspire me. Relaxing in a spa also feels seductive.

When you look after your Soul, you are paying homage to the presence of God within. Do it. Plan to do it today. When you love yourself, you live in grace.

And So It Is