Showing posts with label Authenticity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Authenticity. Show all posts

Friday, May 25, 2018

Coming Home to Yourself


Today I noticed that I was really happy. I was not happy for a reason. I was simply grateful to be who I am, where I am and doing what I do. I found myself singing under my breath... in the back of my mind. It wasn't a profound song, but it was a joyful one. "Zippity-do-dah"  I always like to sing happy songs when I am happy. Being happy and singing are natural, normal expressions of joy! It occurred to me that I had finally come home to myself.

That may sound weird to you because it even sounded weird to me. But  when Spirit whispers Truth to you, you know it. I knew it. I was experiencing a Divine moment.

Nothing has happened or come about to cause me to feel so joyful. It was simply a natural experience of life. It is what life is supposed to feel like. It is what I have felt for the majority of  time since my spiritual awakening, forty years ago.

To tell the truth, I did not know I had not been feeling like my true self until I felt the authentic moment of being Heather Dawn Clark. I felt grateful, blessed and happy.

So now I look back and start gathering up all the clues along my path that I had been "out of my mind." I see that I have been judgmental, distrustful and fearful, mostly about myself. I realize also that I have been creating drama and playing the victim.

I apologize. It was unconscious of me.

For any of you who have been praying for me to awaken to the powerful truth within me -- thank you.

I want to live with a smile on my face and one in my heart. I have so much to be grateful for!

I want to live in gratitude and generosity... to see the world through God's eyes.

I want to stay connected to Source, remembering that it is only in my faulty thinking when I feel separated form It. I am bigger than that. You are bigger than that, too.


It also helps me to be physically active. It helps me to connect with people, ones I know and ones I don't know. For instance, today I went to the grocery store to pick up eggs. I parked and started to get out of my car. A woman was coming to get in to her car which was parked to my right. She glanced at me and I asked her if I had parked too close to her car, if she had enough room to get in. She declared that she had lots of room, that I had parked perfectly! It felt good to have a moment of connection. Earlier in the day, I had arrived at my step aerobics class to find that my step had already been set up in the spot I prefer. My friend who had done it, had then disappeared to work on some strength training. In my right place in my aerobics class, in my right place in the parking lot, and in my right place in life, God is great all the time!.

My question to you is are you at home in yourself?

Friday, July 28, 2017

She Let Go

last weekend, our Board of Trustees was treated to a weekend retreat led by the amazing Rev. Dr. Petra Weldes, senior minister of the Dallas Center for Spiritual Living. It was an amazing weekend with brilliant results. The Board had decided what we wanted to focus on in the retreat. Then Fred Mercado and I had a telephone meeting with Dr. Petra. We wanted to have  a spiritual experience of connection and we wanted to evaluate our Board Commitment and we wanted to create a Mission Statement that moved us forward into our new home. We wanted to examine growth and expansion. We did it all. The Mission of the Center for Spiritual Living Capistrano Valley is:
 This vibrant spiritual center:
·        Teaches Science of Mind principles and practices for transformation and a deepening relationship with the Divine.
·        Creates affirming, inclusive gatherings of unconditional love and acceptance.
·        Contributes to the benefit of the greater community.
We were fairly sizzling with  enthusiasm and agreement when it was completed.

On Friday night, we made a cozy relaxed circle in the back of the all-purpose room. Dr. Petra led us in a meditation and then encouraged us to stay in that consciousness of receptivity to our soul's growth. Then one at a time we were encouraged to read one of the poems that she had brought for the purpose of our deepening. We had many insights from them, including a quote from Meister Eckhart,
"God ripened me
So I see it is true: all objects are wildly in love. "
Each trustee felt deeply connected and provided keen insights to whatever he or she had read. I was the last to read. I read the last poem. Rather it read me. I was sobbing by the third line. It speaks of deep surrender which is something I feel called to do now.

She Let Go by Safire Rose
She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of fear. She let go of judgments.
She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head.
She let go of the committee of indecision within her.
She let go of all the 'right' reasons. Wholly and completely,
without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn't ask anyone advice. She didn't read 
a book on how to let go.  She didn't read the scriptures.
She just let go.

She let go of all the memories that held her back.
She let go of all the anxiety that kept her from moving forward.
She let go of planning and all the calculations about 
how to do it just right.
She didn't promise to let go.
She didn't journal about it.
She didn't write the projected date in her day-timer.
She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper.
She didn't check the weather report or her daily horoscope.
She just let go.

She didn't analyze whether she should let go.
She didn't call her friends to discuss the matter.
She didn't do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment.
She didn't call the prayer line.
She didn't utter one word. She just let go.
No one  was around when it happened.
There was no applause or congratulations.
No one thanked her or praised her.
No one noticed a thing.

Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle.
It wasn't good and it wasn't bad.
It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be.
A light breeze blew through her.
And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.







Wednesday, May 31, 2017

How to Tell It's Your True Calling

Wondering what to look for in a True Calling? 
Here’s a primer...



I used to do a lot of stone sculpting, and when you want to find out whether a stone is “true,” you bang on it with a hammer. If it gives off a dull tone, that means the stone has faults running through it that are likely to crack it apart when you work on it. But if it gives off a clear ring, one that hangs in the air for a moment, that means the stone is “true,” has “integrity,” and most importantly, will hold up under repeated blows.
This is exactly the information you need to know about your callings. You need to know it rings true, has integrity, and is going to hold up under repeated blows—the kind the world specializes in, the kind you’re going to encounter the moment you take your callings and convictions out into the world, where they’re going to get banged on.
One of the best ways to find out whether they’re “true” is to get into the habit of continually tapping in and listening to yourself with what Saint Benedict called “the ear of the heart.” It’s the core of what we’ll be exploring in the Callings workshop at CSLCV on Sunday, June 25, and the heart of what spiritual traditions refer to as discernment, of clarifying your calls. And it sometimes requires not just pick-and-shovel work, but patience on the order of years.
It also helps if you know what to look for—what characterizes “integrity” in a calling.
It’s one of the questions I routinely asked the people I interviewed for the Callings book: How did you know it was a true call? How did you figure out you were on the right path, or that you were the right person? How did you know whether the call came from soul/God/passion, or whether it came from ego/wishful thinking/the desire for financial security/the desire to show the bastards?
The responses people gave me were so consistent, I can list them for you. Here are six signs that a calling is “true”:

1) It keeps coming back, no matter how much you ignore it. A poet named Francis Thompson once wrote a poem called Hound of Heaven, which is about God. He referred to God as a hound-dog because of what hound dogs are famous for, which is tracking people down. They can get one whiff of you and follow you for a hundred miles. In other words, our callings may be “still small voices,” but the true ones have staying power. It’s the blessing and the curse of them—the search party doesn’t retire.

2) The true calls tend to come at you from multiple directions—gifts, talents, dreams both day and night, body symptoms, synchronicities, the books that mysteriously make their way onto your night-table, the way events and opportunities unfold in your life. In other words, there’s a clustering effect, and you’ve got to connect the dots.

3) There’s a feeling of rightness about it. It just feels right. You may not be able to explain it, but you can’t deny it either.

4) Your enthusiasm for it tends to sustain itself over time, and doesn’t just peter out after a few weeks or months or semesters. You even feel a kind of affinity or affection for all the mundane tasks involved in bringing these calls to fruition, and they all have them. No matter how exalted, every calling has its version of licking stamps and stuffing envelopes, making cold calls and tacking posters up on telephone poles.
Author Malcolm Gladwell calculates that mastery in most endeavors requires at least 10,000 hours of dedicated practice—the math: 90 minutes a day for 20 years—and anyone who’s ever been in a play or a band knows that the amount of time they spend rehearsing compared to performing is something like 90-10. But it’s passion that largely explains people’s willingness to put up with that equation. To practice the same lines or lyrics for thousands of hours for the chance to go public with it barely a tenth of the time.

5) It will scare you. Some people even told me that they figured if a call felt safe, it probably wasn’t the right path, but if it scared them, it probably was, because it meant they were close to something vital.
I’m always amused by a bumper sticker campaign I see all around the country on my travels. I think it’s for a clothing company, but it says, “No Fear.” And I don’t buy it. Fear is a biological imperative—it’s hardwired in us. The fight-or-flight mechanism is a perfect example. I think what can happen sometimes is that something else becomes more important to you than the fear you feel, and then you act with real courage and conviction. But no fear? I don’t think so. In fact, I saw one of these bumper stickers in Arizona a few years back. Same sticker, but with a slight alteration made in it, I think in the name of credibility. It said, “Some Fear.”

6) The truth or falseness of a calling is ultimately in the results. In other words, you’ve got to be willing to try it out, to experiment, to go down the path a little ways—even if you’re not sure it’s the path—and take field notes.
What you do is take a step toward a call and look at the feedback your life gives you. Take a step and see if your energy expands or contracts. Take another step and see if you feel more awake or more asleep. Another step—what do your dreams at night tell you? Another step—what does your body tell you? Another step—what do your friends tell you? It’s the old gospel criteria: by their fruits you shall know them.
***** 

Gregg Levoy is the author of the bestseller Callings: Finding and Following An Authentic Life (Random House)—rated among the "Top 20 Career Publications" by the Workforce Information Group—and Vital Signs: Discovering and Sustaining Your Passion for Life (Penguin). He has keynoted at the CSL Asilomar Conference, Smithsonian Institution, Environmental Protection Agency, National Conference on Positive Aging, Microsoft, American Counseling Association, National Career Development Association, and others, and been a frequent guest of the media, including ABC-TV, CNN, NPR and PBS.
A former adjunct professor of journalism at the University of New Mexico, former columnist and reporter for USA Today and the Cincinnati Enquirer, he has written about callings for the New York Times Magazine, Washington Post, Omni, Psychology Today, Reader’s Digest, and many others. His website is www.gregglevoy.com.   




** This blog post is adapted from Gregg Levoy’s book Callings: Finding and Following an Authentic Life (Random House). 

Saturday, November 8, 2014

The Gift of Friendship

Over the years I have noticed something strange about myself. i was always a very sensitive child...at three years old sobbed about Bambi's mother being shot when the story was being read to my older sister. I still make certain I have lots of tissues in my purse when I go to the movies no matter whether going to an animated feature or a love story. I can easily put myself in the characters place and feel their heartbreak or despair. 

However, in my own life letting myself feel and express sadness is almost impossible now. I don't know when it started but I do not like it. I don't want to feel cold-hearted or unresponsive.

I feel like there is a iceberg around my heart. I want to cry, but I can't. It feels fake, forced and inauthentic. What has happened to me?

Maybe the events of life have hardened my heart, or maybe they have desensitized me to the facts.

I wonder if other metaphysicians feel the same way.

My twenty-plus year friendship with Dr. Jane Claypool is a heart-wrenching example. I benefitted so much from my years of friendship with Jane.We laughed together often. We prayed together often. I wonder if we cried together. Right now I do not know.


Please stand with me for an open heart, unprotected and ready to give and receive love. In the 198o's a group of Canadian singers recorded the song "Tears are Not Enough." They may not be enough but they are a start.





Saturday, August 10, 2013

The Gifts of Imperfection


What is real self worth? I am thinking about real self worth and how sometimes we don't feel very good about ourselves. Usually when I don't feel good about myself it is because I have judged myself harshly for making a mistake. Our Prosperity Plus Class is small and we all know each other since we have been together for seven weeks. This week I spent the whole evening calling one of the women students by the wrong name! We even had a lovely conversation about her family during our break. At the end of the class, when we said goodnight, both her boyfriend and another student corrected me. I felt really bad about myself. That evening and for the next few days the inner critic was berating me harshly. It was nonstop. What kind of teacher was I? What kind of person was I? The message I was giving myself was I am not enough. This is a spiritual lie. I made a mistake. People make mistakes dozens of times a day, especially if they are living in creativity and spontaneity.

Brene Brown says we are hard-wired to experience love and connection. I agree. It is the Spiritual Truth. The essence that we are is Love. Love seeks love and nothing else.

Yet when we seek to perform, perfect and please, we will do the opposite of connect. We will keep our distance. It is hard for a minister to give up trying to please everyone because the nature of our jobs is to provide spiritual resources to everyone who seeks them. However, trying to please everyone is a self-defeating, impossible task. My colleagues and I need to be true to ourselves so we can model for our members and friends the true grace and love that flows when we realize that we cannot please everyone, and begin to make choices that please ourselves.

One of my close friends says when there is a situation that might be uncomfortable, she puts on her mental and emotional armor and off she goes. I imagine, with head held high and heart and mind well-protected, like a knight from King Arthur's court. It has been a strategy that she has used successfully in the corporate environment. Another one of my friends says he has no armor. It is REALLY TRUE. His heart is open and he is vulnerable at all times. Often he is the first to weep in times of grief but also in times of joy and celebration. With him, I always feel comfortable telling the whole truth.

When I truly accept my imperfection or mistakes, go a step further and share that with someone, then I begin to feel joy and freedom, instead of feeling exhausted and overwhelmed.

One of the ways you can check to see if you are choosing perfectionism, pleasing and performing over authenticity, check how often you say "yes" to something when you would rather have said "no." Too often we say "yes" when we mean "no" and we say "no" to things that would really make our hearts sing with a resounding "yes."

Here is something we can practice together. When you are asked to do something, take your time and ask yourself do I really want to do this? Or am I going to say "yes" out of a sense of obligation? Brown says: "Choose discomfort over resentment."

The gifts of imperfection are many and include more joy, more freedom, vibrant health, felling vitally alive and connection to the ones you love.

The Gifts of Imperfection
And So It Is! 

Friday, March 8, 2013

Affirmation: Boundaries without Borders




I give myself permission 
to say no to the things or requests that don’t serve my highest calling, 
acknowledging it as an act of self love. 

And I know 
the simple act of setting boundaries 
does not sever or limit my good, 
but rather enhances it 
and allows my authentic self to shine. 

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Authenticity & Connection

January and February are past, but their themes, Authenticity and Connection, are still very much with me. The more I reflect on these two the more inextricably linked they become … truly the proverbial chicken and the egg.

Connection is why we are here. I heard that loud and clear from a multitude of sources this past month. And Authenticity, that desire to live as our true selves, resonates which each of us. We instinctively know we have gifts that only we can give. We know this.

“In order to experience connection we need to allow ourselves to be seen … really seen.” Authenticity at it’s finest.

So what gets in our way of experiencing these blissful states?

Fear & Shame
Shame is described by Brene Brown in the TedTalk below, “Shame is the fear of disconnection. Is there something about me that if other people know it or see it that I won’t be worthy of connection?”

I don’t like vulnerability.
I don’t like fear.
And I feel shame at the drop of a hat.

It’s something that makes me feel more fragile than a porcelain doll. And I will push away anyone who makes me feel this way, either that or indulge in my version of “a couple beers and a banana nut muffin.”

I just need that cushy bubble between me and the rest of the world.

But at the same time I am painfully aware of what Brene shared “you can’t selectively numb emotion.” You numb out vulnerability, grief, shame, fear, disappointment and you also numb out joy, gratitude, happiness, and creativity.”

The antidotes she discovered in her research:
  • to let ourselves be seen 
  • to love with our whole hearts 
  • to practice gratitude and joy 
  • to know I am enough 

And so I will be on the lookout for “Tools for Transformation” in these areas.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Uncovering a Glimmer of the Authentic

Uncovering a Glimmer of the Authentic
Childhood offers clues to our authentic self when we take the time to remember.
Recently, I felt the urge to declutter my spaces. In those moments when I'm ready to release things, I look thoughtfully at my book shelf. I think, "Is there a book that I can let go of?" And every time, I decide I'm not ready and I've realized that it's because each of those books has a message for me. It's not always a message I need immediately, but rather I wait until I'm called. I got one of those calls today.

The still small voice inside brought to the fore front of my consciousness Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach. Simple Abundance contains 366 essays for unearthing the spiritual beauty and simplicity in our daily lives. Written specifically for women, the words comfort me like a warm cup of tea. On this day, I'm called to the essay for February 19 titled Rendezvous with the Authentic Archaeologist. In that essay, Breathnach writes:

"Whether you realize it or not, you have lived many lives, and each one has left an indelible mark on your soul.  I'm referring to the episodic way in which our lives evolve: childhood, adolescence, college and early career years, marriage, motherhood, perhaps life as a single mother, widowhood and onward. Each life experience leaves a layer of memory like a deposit of sediment: things we've loved and moments of contentment we've cherished that when recalled, reveal glimmers of our true selves."  

Ah...yes...that makes so much sense! Sometimes, when I'm confused, I look outside myself for guidance. I ask friends for their opinions on what is right for me. But, as Breathnach reminds me, the only true answer comes from within, recalling where I've found joy and contentment. Those beautiful memories provide clues to my individual path, my heart's desire. Not my husband's preferences or my parents' wishes or my friends' choices, but my authentic life. And that life has evolved from childhood to now, sculpted by my experience. Isn't that beautiful?! Sometimes I watch my four-year-old daughter and wish I could be that authentic. When she's happy she sings without a care as to where she is or who is watching or if she's even on key. When she's sad, she cries and it doesn't matter if we are in the library, the supermarket or our home. Now, most of us wouldn't want to live life quite that out-loud, but to have a glimmer of it might serve our souls.

I think Simple Abundance will leave my bookshelf for now to live on my bedside table to provide me with daily "aha" moments. Join me! If you own Simple Abundance pull it off your book shelf. If not, you can purchase it by clicking below:


Monday, February 18, 2013

Debbie Ford...The life she touched

 Debbie Ford lived authentically and had the courage to shine her light into her shadows
and helped illuminate all of ours.
Just last month I wrote about my process of embracing my shadow characteristics and emotions inspired by the book, Dark Side of the Light Chasers written by Debbie Ford. It's been a favorite and classic book on my book shelf that I refer to occasionally when called.

Well, today, I read the sad news that Debbie Ford made her transition yesterday after a long battle with cancer. In a letter, her sister wrote that Debbie was ready and that she felt she had completed her mission here on Earth. I have to say that I am so grateful she lived and that she touched my life through her writing.

I can't even begin to imagine how many lives she transformed through her books, her talks, her videos and her foundations. She lived authentically and had the courage to shine her light into her shadows and helped illuminate all of ours.

Rest in Peace Debbie Ford.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Bringing Light to the Shadows

It led me to one of my favorite books, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford
photo credit: Juli Isola
To truly embrace our authenticity, we must recognize, know and accept our whole self; not just the light-hearted, happy, socially-acceptable parts but also the sadness, irritation, discontent, and failings.

The theme for January’s Sunday talks was authenticity, so it’s no surprise that in two conversations with friends this month, the topic of the dark night of the soul and spiritual darkness came up. It led me to one of my favorite books, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford. In the first few chapters she reminds us that there are gifts in the traits and emotions we judge as bad. Frustration or ill-content with a job leads us to search for change. Anger and outbursts can protect our personal boundaries leading to greater self care. Our experience of sadness allows us to offer compassion and understanding to others who are facing loss or heart ache.

Ian Percy echoed these ideas in his talk at the Center this past Sunday. Ian suggested that we face irritation before insight. The irritation drives us to find the possibilities for greater expression.

Simply put the light and the dark are two sides of the same coin. Without one, we can’t really fully experience the other.

What part of yourself are you hiding today? Can you find the gifts in the characteristics or emotions you label bad or wrong? Freedom and true authenticity comes from bringing light to the darkness. When we understand and trust that there is only good and it is all God, then we can fully shine our light in the world.

~Juli Isola

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Center For Spiritual Living Welcome Home!

Center For Spiritual Living Welcome Home!
Happy New Year!
We are very happy and excited to share this first Sunday of 2013 with you. We have such a great year of wonderful topics and inquiries for the adults and our youth. 

This Sunday we are kicking off with a great theme for January: Authenticity, Your Inner Journey. Both the adults and the youth will be inspired and uplifted with knowing themselves and embracing the authentic self. 

We hope to see each of you Sunday.